Essay on Marriage Rites among Hindus, Christians and Sikhs !
Marriage Rites among Hindus:
Saraswati writes that a boy should marry a girl of equal status. There are considered to be eight forms of marriage
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Brahma, Daiva, Arsa, Prajapatya, Asurg, Gandharva, Raksasa and Paisach. This first four of these methods are Prasasta or approved; the last four are Aprasata -or disapproved.
There are two kinds of Rituals in Bhramanic marriage, that is,
(a) Sastrachar and
(b) Lokacharya.
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(a) The Sastrachar are performed according to the textual canons of the shastras.
(b) The orally transmitted Ritual are Lokachar or Striachar.
Rites of marriage which appeared in the Paddhaitis and Prayogagranthas are given below:
(i) A formal selection of the bribe.
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(ii) The nuptial canopy is made.
(iii) Fixing the time for the marriage ceremony.
(iv) Fetching earth for growing sprouts a few days before the wedding.
(v) Worship of Ganesh (Ganesh Puja).
(vi) Establishing a water-clock on the day of the marriage.
(vii) Ancestor and Goddess worship.
(viii) Worship by the father-in-law of the bride who worship the Goddess Gauri.
(ix) Worship of the wife of Indra: Sachi.
(x) Announcement of ancestors of bride and bridegroom with gotra and pravara. Then there is Kanyadaan, the gift of the virgin.
(xi) The protection cord is tied.
(xii) The bridegrooms scarf is tied to one end of the bride’s sari, Saptapadi follows. This is the rite of “seven-steps”.
(xiii) Putting vermillion on the parted hair of the bride.
(xiv) The bridegroom now sites on a pile of rice. The groom and bride throw rice on each other.
(xv) A tali is tied by the groom around the neck of the bride.
(xvi) A bamboo plate is given by the bridegroom’s mother to the bride’s people. These rights are aspect of one ceremony and though extended sometimes for a few days that essentially form the rites of separation.
The Kanyadaan means the “gift of the virgin”. Only the father is properly entitled to make this gift or someone in his place when the father is not there. Thus the grandfather, brother, and others including the mother are entitled to give away the girl.
A Sankalpa is uttered and then bride is given away formally. Satpadi are given greater prominence.
This is the rite of seven steps and without it the marriage is incomplete. The husband wife step in a northerly direction in seven steps. However it is also a Lokachar custom that the bride and groom go round the sacred fire seven times. Puffed rice is sprinkled by the bride who follows the groom her sari being tied to his turban. This Ritual practice is supposed to legally bind the couple in Matrimony. Magical rites are used to make the Post-consummation Mathion period safe for the woman.
Marriage Rites among Syrian Christians:
The initiative in negotiating a marriage usually rests on the bride’s family. When the appropriate choice has been made, according to the side, a representative of the boys’ family is sent to settle the marriage. Today, while wooing and courtship are out, supervised condition to talk for a brief while. This supervision is done usually by the girl’s mother or her married sister.
The bethrothal ceremony among the Syrian Christians takes place on the day banns or formal proclamation of the intended marriage, are announced by the priest in the Church immediately after the Sacramental service to commemorate the last Super of Jesus Christ. As usual all the ceremonies proceeding the marriage ceremony are the rites of separation preliminarily.
A bethrothal feast is held in the bride’s house which begins with sweets and is followed by a formal meal. This is the time when the dowry is handed over. The marriage service consists of two parts:
(i) The first is the bethrothal and
(ii) The second is the solemnization of the marriage.
When the bride couple arrives at the Church, two gold chains and a cloth serve as a veil for the bride. The minus or tali are placed on a table in front of the sanctuary. The couple stand in front of this table, the bride on the right of the bridegroom.
The service commences with prayers and blessing of the two rings. The priest first places the ring on the right hand fourth or “ring finger” and blesses it. He then places the ring on the corresponding finger of the bride’s hand. It is believed that the ring finger has a vein which is directly linked with the heart.
Next we have the blessing on the crowns. The Gold chains with crosses are blessed by the priest. Then he raises the chain from the groom three times like a crown and places it on his cheek. He does the same with the chain of the bride.
The priest now begins the actual ceremony of marriage. The priest places the tali around the bride’s neck and the husband ties the thread of the minu in a knot. After this the priest puts a cloth. The cloth is a gift from the groom to the bride on her head and the marriage ceremony closes.
After the Church wedding the bridal couple comes in procession to the bride’s house. A pandal or shamiana is erected. There the rites the marriage is solemnized. The procession to the bride’s house is rites of incorporation or postliminality. They are met at the gate by young women carrying lights. The crowd shouts ‘nada nada’, ‘walk walk’ and blows shrill whistles. The bride must take the right foot over the threshold. The reason is, this is both a mark of respect as well as an omen of good luck.
The couple sits on a dais amidst floral patterns made of rice and flowers. Rose water is sprinkled on the guests and pan supari are distributed. Marriage songs are sung and the wedding feast begins. Pan supari and tobacco are served before the guests depart. Thus Syrian Christians have a large number of customs for their marriages.
Marriage Rites among Sikhs:
Sikhs live in extended families. So, marriage is not a personal affair alone but forges a lasting bond between two groups. The wife who enters into a new group must prove herself compatible. This compatibility is expected not only with the husband but with others including the husband’s brother, sister, sister-in-laws, parents and so on.
Usually the eldest daughter marries before her younger sister. If there is death in the family e.g. a father dies then the elder son’s marriage is postponed till the younger children have completed their education.-The family and its friends assist in finding a partner. What is looked for, is suitability in the form of virtuous qualities, temperament, and age. Social status are also looked into. Finally, the caste is also taken into account.
Thus a Jat is likely to marry a Jat and a Ramgarhia. Sikhs should not marry close to their family or “whose caste name is the same at the distance of the four grandparents”. The couple meets informally before the final decision is made. This is done in the presence of some of the family elders. It enables them to familarise themselves with, and assess the prospects of the Matrimonial alliance.
A bethrothal ceremony may take place before the marriage but it is not compulsory. The wedding is both a social and a religious occasion. Sikhs do not believe in auspicious/inauspicious days. The wedding takes place in the bride’s village, on a flat roof top of a country house or garden or gurudwara. It is important that the Guru Granth Sahib should be there.
The groom’s party usually arrives at the evening earlier than the formal meeting of the two families take place. The covering hymn Asa di Var is sung. The groom takes his place at the foot of the Adi Granth. The bride sits to the left of the groom alone with a friend. A short hymn containing general advice is sung. Hymns are sung giving advice on marriage.
The bride and groom assent marriage by bowing to the Guru Granth Sahib. The bride’s father garlands the Guru Granth Sahib. Then the bride’s dupatta is tied to the muslin scarf which hangs from the groom’s shoulders. The Lavan of Guru Ram Das is turned to. The verse is sung as a couple walk around the Guru Granth Sahib in a clockwise direction the groom in front. They return to their place and the second verse is read. The circling is now repeated. This happens four times.
As the last encirclement is completed, flower petals are thrown. The service ends with the singing of the first five and the last stanzas of the Anand followed by the Ardas prayer. The congregation is served Karah Prasad. The marriage party leaves for the grooms village in the afternoon. The entire ceremony is the liminal or transition aspect of the ceremony.
(i) The first circling is for adherence to the householders’ duties.
(ii) The second circling is for faith in God.
(iii) In the third for living detachedly in the world with eyes fixed towards God.
(iv) The fourth circling and verse describe the return of the soul to God. Thus Sikhism is symbolic but maintains a simplicity and beauty of Ritual.